Thursday, May 18, 2017

WTH is "Thin Privilege"?


Maybe I am not understanding how the word “privilege” is being used here, or maybe I am just atypical in my experience.  But, growing up underweight and tiny, I have experienced both sides of the size spectrum.  And neither is perfect.  Granted, being thinner seems to have more “perks” or “privileges” than being fat, but that doesn’t mean both are without positives and negatives.

 

Out of this list, here are the ones that I have experienced first-hand:

Finding clothing in my size in any store – most of the time I front $$$$ ordering stuff online and then pay shipping fees to send back what doesn’t work.

Flying – thigh and arm spillage on the person next to me, as well as having to use a seat belt extender.  The seat belt extender doesn’t bother me – but I don’t like encroaching on others’ space.

Bathroom stalls with my kid – this can be tough to navigate in non-handicapped stalls.

Booths in restaurants – my boobs almost always spill onto the table like they are the main course.  It is both awkward for the person sitting across from me, as well as my food gets all over my shirts.

Steering wheels – this was a big issue, especially when I was very pregnant.  Being plus size and petite, I need to sit up close to reach the pedals, but I also need space for the belly and boobs and butt.

Walking in between tables and in movie theaters – this is always awkward.  I always think “What’s less likely to rub up against someone, my belly or my butt?” It’s always the belly.  The belly, while big at times, is never as big as the butt.  This becomes an issue when boarding a plane, too.

Rides – My kid loves to go to Lollipop Park – a mini amusement park for little kids.  On some of the rides, adults “under 150 pounds” can ride with their kid.  Every time I climb into the Ferris Wheel with her I worry that our carriage will fall and shatter to the ground because I am over 150 pounds.  Part of that is my anxiety talking, but it’s a real fear.  But I still go, because they say it’s ok for me to ride and my kid wants to go with me.

Boots – This is probably my biggest issue with being big.  I cannot wear even mid-calf boots because, unless I buy a super wide calf boot and then pay a cobbler to put in an extension panel, none of them will fit me.  And even then, I can’t tuck my jeans in because my thighs are heavy and I will look like a Canadian Bounty.  Not sexy.

Motorized carts – When I had my gall bladder out, my c-section and dislocated my knee, I did use the motorized carts when shopping.  And I did get stares. And a couple of times a kid asked why I was using it, because they could not see any visible issue (other than my weight).

Student desks – I can’t even with this.

Job interviews – I personally have never not gotten a job because of my weight, but I DID witness someone else not give someone a job because they were heavy.  Granted, that person was a total biatch and got what was coming to her.  But still – I was SHOCKED when she just blatantly said that the woman was too fat for the admin position…

Ambulance gurney – When I have been taken by ambulance, I have apologized to the EMTs for having to lift me.  It’s a thankless job and I am heavy.  Let’s be honest.  Same thing when I was being transferred from my hospital bed to the OR table for my c-section.  I apologized to the doctors and nurses who had to lift me.  Yes it’s part of their job, but it’s not easy.

Infertility – This one I actually did feel the sting of repeatedly.  And I am so glad I proved that OB wrong.  As well as the one during labor.

Charge extra for weight – When I buy clothes, sometimes I have to pay extra because I need a bigger size and that requires more fabric.  It’s just business – more material = more cost.

Step stool or ladder – I will never forget when I started my current job.  I was the only shorty in an office of tall people, and I don’t like asking for help.  So I asked my leggy work sister wife if we had a step stool?  We didn’t, she informed me.  Then the next day, Staples delivered me a step stool.  It was so thoughtful and sweet.  And it has a 150 pound weight limit.  So I still use it, but I say a little prayer every time, LOL.

 _______________________________________________

With all of this, though, it has never occurred to me to consider NOT having to deal with these things a “privilege” of being thin.  It’s just reality.  I feel like lists like this are a Catch-22.  If a thin person then acknowledges their Thin Privilege because they DON’T have to deal with any of these things, how does that not seem like a criticism of someone who is fat who DOES have to deal with these things?



On the same token, I know thin people who work their little assess off at being thin or fit or whatever.   So these “privileges” are actually things they have worked hard for.  Seems like it’s deserving, no?  While I don’t deserve society deliberately making my life harder because I am fat, I haven’t put in the work to not be fat.  So that’s my issue – not anyone else’s.  (I know that there are people who are overweight despite great efforts.  But they are the outliers.  Most of us who are heavy know why we are heavy and could change that if we worked at it.  But only if that is something you desire to do.  You don’t HAVE to.  But if you want to, you likely can.)

 
Also, there are fat privileges, too.  For instance, being fat, I have boobs.  And boobs make clothes look nice.  When I was thin and didn’t have boobs, all I wanted was boobs.  So is that a “fat privilege” then since I have bigger boobs? No. It’s just a fact of reality.

 

Also, I am very nice to snuggle with.  I am soft and squishy and that’s wonderful to cozy up to.  Is that a “fat privilege”.  No.  It just is what it is.

 
I feel like a lot of this list is more like nuisances that occur as a result of being overweight, but it’s not worth letting it stop you from living your life.  I would rather make a list of how lucky I am to have a home to live in, food to eat, clean water, access to healthcare,  access and the financial bandwith to pay for excellent childcare for my daughter….THOSE are lists worth making.  If we make lists like this and focus solely on what is hard about life, WTH kind of frame of mind will we be in?  Victim.  I will not be a victim because I am a big girl.  Eff that.



Someone makes a snarky comment to you because you ordered a bacon cheeseburger?  WTH. Who cares what they think.  You go eat your cheeseburger with a big smile on your face and go about your day.  Their rude ass doesn’t matter one bit.

Do not let weight define who you are, whether big or small.  Don’t think you’re worth less because you’re big, and don’t think you’re the shit because you’re tiny.  Focus more on what matters and will be a constant over time: your character.  Skinny people get fat and fat people lose weight. So don’t behave in a way that, should either thing happen to you, you will look like a jerkface.

Just be real, be authentic, and focus on what is good in your life.  I know this is easier said than done for some people who really struggle emotionally about their weight.  But let's figure out a way to lift eachother up in our curvy girl awesomeness, focus on living healthy, happy lives just as ourselves.  Making a list of things that skinny people don't have to deal with doesn't seem productive to me.  But again, I may not be the norm.  Give me feedback.  Especially my Body Love people.  I want to hear what you think.


Though I am still going to mourn not being able to wear cute boots.

1 comment:

  1. This is, as always, written in your unique voice, and I loved it. I adore your statement about how heavy people can lose weight, and thin people can gain it, so don't be a turd. Thanks for being you!

    ReplyDelete